Daughter
by lrhaboggle
Summary: What if Chief Elder and Giver used to be friends... lovers? What if the thing that brought them together also tore them apart? A daughter.


Jeff and Meryl had been best friends forever. Even though he was now Receiver of Memory and she was only a low ranking member on the Council, they continued their friendship.

"You've got to see this," Jeff whispered to her one day as he walked her home from her job.

"What?" she asked, put off and amused by his enthusiasm. Wordlessly, he gestured for her to hold out her arms and as she did so, he grabbed them. At first, nothing changed for Meryl, but then she thought she saw the trees flickering and changing in a way she couldn't describe…

"Receivers of Memory shall not share their training!" an intercom crackled to life and Jeff pulled away from Meryl awkwardly.

"Did you see it?" he asked lowly as he stepped away from her.

"I think," she murmured back. "Something happened in the trees…"

From then on, Jeff continued to sneak these moments in with Meryl. He would show her everything he did in training that day and it became their little secret, only done under the cover of night or away from the prying eyes of the Community cameras. This was a difficult feat to pull off, but with their combined wit and enthusiasm, they made it work. For awhile, it was a lot of fun! Meryl learned more and more about the world every day and was granted the thrill of doing something dumb and dangerous with her best friend while Jeff got the chance to show the person he loved most in the world a part of his new life. It was nice to be able to talk about it with someone and it was even nicer that that someone wasn't one of those mindless Community members who insisted upon bowing to him every time their paths crossed. This new level of respect and honor was something Jeff just couldn't get used to so he was relieved when Meryl promised she would treat him no differently than before.

But all of that came to an abrupt halt when Jeff visited her in the middle of the night with a wild look in his unnaturally pale eyes. During their time together, Meryl learned that his eyes were called "blue". Hers were brown.

"Jeff?! What are you doing in my room?! It's 1:00 am!" she whisper-yelled after he had shaken her awake.

"We have to show them!" he begged. "The memories! The Community must get them back!"

"Are you mad?!" she was trying hard not to yell. Such escapades were not unheard of between the two, but they were adults now and to have Jeff just casually break into her room and wake her up in the middle of the night while looking like he'd just finished playing a very intense game of war was not something she was too ok with.

"The memories! You don't understand, but we have to give them back! They're dangerous! They can't just be contained to one person…" he continued to plead with her to use her spot in the Council to help him lobby the big change. That was when Meryl finally put her foot down.

"No," she said, sitting up to illustrate her point. It was the first time he'd ever heard such a cold and cruel note in her voice. "I can't," she said. "It's again the rules!" and nothing would change her mind. On the contrary, listening to Jeff insist his idea of freedom, change, and choice made Meryl all the more determined to maintain order and obedience.

"Please!" he cried, sensing that her faith in him was fading.

"I'm sorry Jeff, but I cannot, in good heart, go through with this crazy scheme of yours," she said coldly. He looked so very sad that she felt guilty for hurting his feelings. "I apologize for hurting your feelings but-" before she could finish he cut her off.

"I accept your apology," he muttered, but then he walked off without looking back, slipping out of her window and into the darkened streets.

For the next few weeks, Meryl and Jeff only saw each other in passing and they exchanged short, clipped words. Both of them wanted badly to mend their friendship but neither wanted to be the one to make the first move at apologizing. But then, a new person entered their lives and she was able to fix them right up again. Who was this girl? It was their daughter…

It all began when a Birthmother ended up dying while in labor. It was a very rare thing to have happen and the Community was forced to come up with a quick alternative. They decided to send in one of their less than useful women to replace the dead Birthmother until a new one could be appointed. Meryl was the replacement they chose. She spent the next year in the Birthing Center, tending to a new life cultivating in her womb. She had to admit that it was quite nice there.

"You should be extra proud too," one doctor said when Meryl expressed her enjoyment at this place. She gave him a confused look. "Didn't you know?" he looked surprised. "Surely someone must've told you why you're getting more privilege than any other Birthmother?"

"I assumed it was just because I was a replacement," she answered with a genuinely confused look in her eyes.

"No," the doctor corrected. "It's because you're carrying Receiver of Memory's child," his voice turned reverent as he looked at Meryl's bulging belly. Meryl felt her heart jump in her throat as the doctor told her this. Memories, some that were hers and some that weren't, came flashing through her mind and suddenly, the idea of having a child with Jeff they made Meryl feel… happy. It didn't make sense but, for some reason, after hearing about who this child's birthfather was, Meryl felt an undeniably happy and fulfilled warmth enter her body.

"Can I see him?" Meryl asked, referring to her child's father. Again, a strange thrill filled Meryl's heart. She was having Jeff's baby! Why did that make her feel so excited? She didn't know, but it did.

"Not unless he chooses to come," the doctor answered, face growing serious again as he turned from Meryl's belly to her face.

"Ok," Meryl tried not to sound too disappointed. They still hadn't made up from their arguments about the memory policy and, now that she was carrying his child, Meryl wanted desperately to reconcile with him.

Her wish was granted soon after the baby was born. It was a girl named Rosemary. When Rosemary was taken from Meryl to be given to Jeff, Meryl felt a surprisingly sharp pang of sorrow in response. She didn't want to lose the daughter. _Her_ daughter.

"Don't worry, you can visit her whenever you want," Jeff said, the absolutely radiant smile on his face speaking more to her than any apology ever would. "I've secured permission and the Community says that you can visit Rosemary and I whenever you want," he said.

"Really?!" Meryl's eyes lit up. That pang in her chest faded as Jeff nodded and handed her the baby.

For the next 16 years, Meryl and Jeff were friends again. She even let him talk to her about the memories sometimes and Rosemary became the light and life of both of them. But again, even this joy could not last. When Rosemary was 16, things changed. Meryl could no longer visit because she was the new Chief Elder and Rosemary had become the new Receiver of Memory. Their last supper together was bittersweet.

"I wish you could still visit," Rosemary sighed.

"I know darling," Meryl answered sadly. "But I'll still see you," she added.

"I know," Rosemary nodded, still frowning though.

"I'm proud of you," Meryl added weakly. It worked though, because Rosemary began to smile again.

"You already knew this was coming," she joked and Meryl chuckled. Even Jeff looked happy. He smiled. But that was the last time Meryl would see it for another decade. Just a few months following Rosemary and Meryl's ascensions, Rosemary applied for Release.

"How could you?" Meryl whispered brokenly as she and Jeff looked at the casket that held their daughter.

"I tried," he answered back, sounding just as broken. "I really did."

"Well why didn't you try harder?" she asked, voice a little louder. After that, things got out of control.

"This is your fault!" Meryl screamed finally. "If you really loved her, you would've saved her! Now she's dead because of you and I didn't even get a chance to say goodbye to her, my daughter!" Meryl continued. She knew her words were harsh, but she missed Rosemary so much already. Following Rosemary's Release, some of the memories she had returned to the Community and Meryl now understood that she was enduring something called "mourning" and that mourning came from "grief" and "loss" when somebody you loved "died". The memories hurt, but they wouldn't stop coming and the sorrow was finally turning to rage. It was irresponsible of her, but Meryl proceeded to take that anger out on Jeff.

Meryl continued to blame Jeff for their daughter's death, but he didn't reply. Instead, he only stared hollowly at Rosemary's casket and shook his head slowly. This only made Meryl madder. Here she was, missing Rosemary just as much as Jeff was, yet Jeff was looking like only he felt the sting. Meryl grew disgusted by him. This perceived selfishness she got from him was the last straw. She gave him one last look of hurt and anger and blame before she stormed out of the room. She didn't look back and neither did Jeff.

For the next decade, the pair only went by their Community titles of Chief Elder and Receiver of Memory. Their interactions decreased to the point that on the off chance they actually did come in contact, every word and action was guarded and hostile. They were enemies now. Finally, it came to a point where the Council was advising the appointment of a new Receiver of Memory and Chief Elder wanted to put that idea down just so she could hurt Receiver of Memory by leaving him alone with the memories. She knew that without an apprentice, he alone would bear the pain of the memories, so she wanted to keep him alone as long as she could. But at the same time, she knew the Council was right. The current Receiver was getting old and they really did need fresh blood soon. Because of that, she swallowed her pride and helped the Council choose their best candidate. They couldn't afford to lose another Receiver… At last, the Council found a boy named Jonas.

A few months after Jonas' appointment, however, things went sour again.

"I thought I told you we couldn't afford another mistake," Chief Elder growled as she and her guards apprehended Receiver of Memory (who now went by "Giver") under suspicion of trying to return the memories again. She had lots of witnesses too.

"You did," Giver shrugged. "So we didn't."

"You were planning this all along," Chief Elder spat, angered by his relaxed appearance. "No good person would defy the Community."

"Yes," Giver shrugged again to Chief Elder's anger. "And you're right, only a _great_ person would defy the Community," he added, eyes shining grimly. She scowled at him will ill-concealed hatred.

"Then we will find the boy," Chief Elder told him, voice colder and harder than ice. "And we will lose him…" With that, she turned away from her old friend and let the guards continue punishing him.

A week later, word got out that Jonas was dead. Good. Now Chief Elder could carry on with the trial against Giver without worrying about Jonas breaching the Community's safety. Along the way, Chief Elder found out that Jonas had an accomplice in the form of a young woman named Fiona. She was to be Released. Her trial was set and all the Council (plus Giver) said around in waiting.

"You can stop this, you know," Giver whispered to her as the Release began.

"If this bothers you, look away," she answered sharply, gesturing for the process to start. Jonas' father was doing the deed.

"Her name was Rosemary. She was my daughter. I loved her," Giver spoke again finally.

"Precision of language," Chief Elder answered on reflex. She knew full well he was only trying to buy Fiona time. Well, it wouldn't work.

"I couldn't be more precise," Giver shot back, but this time his words were almost laced with joy and peace instead of bitterness and sorrow. He went on with his speech about love and Chief Elder wasn't sure if his words were making her sick or… something else… Nope, no, no, his words were definitely making her sick. It could be nothing else! There were tears in her eyes. Rosemary… Her daughter. No! It was all a trick!

"Love can turn to hate," Chief Elder interrupted Giver. "You've seen the suffering it has caused," _I have too._ she added, thinking about Rosemary. That girl hadn't crossed her mind in years… "You want to bring all that back," she started again, accusingly.

"But if you could only see the possibility!" Giver cried. She rolled her eyes. Even now, he was so stubborn! "We could choose better!"

"But we won't!" argued Chief Elder. "We never do!" she cried and unfortunately, she wasn't wrong, but Giver wasn't finished. The pair continued to argue while Giver reached out, trying to find one sympathetic face amongst the Council.

"Continue with the Release!" Chief Elder cried suddenly, tired of all these games and speeches. Jonas' father, who had been busy listening in on the argument, jumped at her words and nodded as he reached for the needle. Fiona was in tears now, but they did not move Chief Elder one bit. At least, they weren't supposed to. Just before the needle touched Fiona's skin, everything changed. Chief Elder could feel it in the air and see it in everybody's face, especially Giver…

So Jonas hadn't been dead. This had been a set up all along and now the memories were back. But for some reason, this didn't bother Chief Elder as much as it should've. Instead, she almost felt…hopeful. Her past came back to her amongst the sea of memories flashing before her eyes. In those memories, she saw Giver in his happier days and she saw her own daughter: Rosemary, with him. Rosemary…

"Are you still against me?" Giver asked a month later. Jonas was still missing and people were still adjusting to the memories, but besides that, everything was back in order. Mostly. Chief Elder was considering surrendering her position, though to whom, she had no idea. Technically, her term was supposed to end two months ago, but the Jonas fiasco bought her extra time. Not that she wanted it anymore.

"Perhaps," she answered, voice not as frosty as usual.

"Good," he murmured. She met his eyes, surprised at his lack of a snide remark. "If you had been on my side, I would've feared that you weren't the same girl I loved. Hotheaded and defiant," he chuckled.

"That's not me," she answered shortly. "That's you. You were the one always trying to get me to join your wild schemes!" she accused. "You were the hotheaded, stubborn and defiant one, but I wasn't!"

"Are you sure about that?" he asked, almost teasing her. When she only huffed at him, he continued with a chuckle. "You know the only reason I kept asking you to join me on my crazy quests was just because I knew you'd never say yes. I just liked watching you worry for me."

"You're awful!" Chief Elder grunted softly.

"I knew you loved me then," he added with an different shrug. She had looked away while chastising him, but now she dared meet those strange yet beautiful eyes as he said this.

"Love," she whispered. "Do you still think it was worth the threat of war, death, fear, pain, and torment?"

"Yes," he spoke with such conviction that she let it drop.

The pair continued to walk through the Community in silence.

"Well, I'm glad to know you love me again," Chief Elder finally grunted sarcastically just to break the quietness that had settled over them.

"Again?" he asked, his pale, blue eyes were sad. "I never stopped…" A dull ache in her chest returned. "But you stopped loving me," he continued. "I don't hold it against you, but I miss it. Honestly, I do. So if you ever might consider being my friend again even after all the pain I've inflicted upon you…" Giver trailed off while Chief Elder was left in stunned silence. All along, this chat had been moving to his apology and his willingness to submit to her, just like she always wanted, but this time in love. She had so much power now! She could break him and get revenge for all the years he'd tormented her! All she had to do was say no...

"Yes," she answered and then she gave the first real smile to him that she had given to anyone in a very long time. "Yes," she repeated, then Giver began to smile wide enough to match her own grin.

"Thanks Meryl," he murmured, opening his arms to hug her again after far too long.

"You're welcome Jeff," she answered, receiving his hug and breathing in his smell. Home.

"I'm sorry I blamed you for Rosemary," Meryl said as she dined with him that night in his little house on the edge of the Community.

"It's ok," Jeff answered. They still used their titles, but not around each other. Not anymore. "I did too."

"But you were innocent," she protested. "You did your best. In the end, she would've committed to this anyway because she had inherited your stubbornness," she paused to smile and he chuckled. "She made her choice, we've made ours. All we can do now is live with it."

"And we will," Jeff promised, sounding stronger than he had in years.

"Yes. I will always miss our daughter, but I think I see some of her in Jonas," Meryl confessed. "So if he ever comes back, perhaps you can introduce me to him. Your son," she suddenly looked away, shy and nervous.

" _Our_ son," Jeff corrected her and that was how Meryl knew that all had been forgiven.

 **AN: I read a headcanon that said Chief Elder was Rosemary's mother, so I just kind of took that headcanon and wrote a story about it. Hope the ship doesn't seem too crazy or unrealistic, but I actually quite like it and even if the timing is a bit off, I think it could work canonically.**


End file.
